THE BANE OF ATTACHMENT.

So I was watching this documentary on natural disasters and a whole city somewhere in the US had been swept away by hurricane. The government however, made provision for rescue and there were helicopters and speed boats provided to rescue people trapped in the hurricane aftermath.

One of the rescue officials was interviewed on why there were quite a number of people dead and many still trapped despite the very early warnings about the coming hurricane and the instructions for residents to evacuate. It’s the consequence of attachment, he simply responded. The people are so attached, they’d rather risk their lives remaining here than letting go of a place they’ve become very attached to.

This remark hit me in such a powerful way. I began to think about it and realized many of us are simply in our dangerous, destructive and demeaning situations in life basically due to attachments. We are too attached to let go of what used to be good, profitable, rewarding and pleasing hence, we are willing to go down with it when it goes bad, down and out.

Being attached is an emotional feeling of being tied to something, someone or an experience and it’ll hurt real bad to detach. Being attached is being emotionally imprisoned or consumed in something, someone or someplace.

Now life is meant and designed to be progressive. Life is a journey, you are not supposed to remain in a place, with some people or in a condition all lifelong. You’re designed to keep walking and moving and progressing.

Pain, hurt, distress and frustration however, sets in when you overstay your welcome with some people and/or in some places.

However, moving on in life is not a matter of choice but an outcome of qualification through real growth and maturity.

You earn your next mile in your journey through life by doing what it takes to obtain the right of passage, if not, life will return you to where you were if you don’t qualify for your next mile in your journey.

The dilemma in not growing is becoming trapped in a place you’ve physically outgrown and experiencing rejection in a place you should belong to but not qualified for.

Many of us don’t want to outgrow a stage in our life because we are attached to that stage. We have become emotionally locked into a particular stage a transition to even a higher and better stage becomes unappealing.

Many of us don’t also want to move on up to a next stage in life because we don’t want to do the work or pay the price it requires to move forward and onward, after all, we are enjoying the stage  were at currently, goes the thinking.

Dear friend, hurricane is coming. Hear the warning, hear the sound; heed the warning. Yes you may be enjoying where you’re at and what you’re doing right now, but how about tomorrow? The weather, is changing, the weatherman is shouting, hurricane is coming!

Dear friend, hurricane, is coming. You’re so attached to a place in life you have in fact fallen in love with your sufferings there. You have embraced your sufferings so much you brag about it.                                                                                                                                                                                        

Dear friend, hurricane is coming, it’s time to stop using your background to answer everything that questions your poor performance in life. People with more painful, disadvantaged or even horrific backgrounds have advanced in life and become extremely successful. Even people with physical disabilities are doing great things despite their limitations.  I know people orphaned right from childhood, used as slaves by relatives and so called caregivers; surmount all terrible treatments and challenges and become great in this life, so what’s the big deal about your poor background, your broke father, irresponsible parents or plenty siblings? Dear friend, hurricane is coming.

So you were used, so you were abused, so you were cheated, rejected and abandoned? He lied to you, she deceived you, cheated on you, stole from you, wasted your years and derailed your dreams in life, you gave so  much and got nothing back hence, you have become so attached to the experience at that stage in your life, you’ve refused to look ahead, see ahead or move on to greater things. Dear friend, don’t end your life before it truly ends, don’t end your story before your narrative is complete, why not turn a new leaf and begin to write a new chapter in your wonderful and interesting story of life. Detach from the experience, the disappointment and great pain, let go and move on to the next experience, you need to, you have to; hurricane is coming. Don’t go down.

Ohh, you’re so attached to your convenient life, I see that. A good job, good salary, a stable income, you can pay all your bills now, it’s your season of plenty, oh pretty cool, but have you taken a peek into the future to see if there’s a possibility of a famine, a dry season, a depression, economic downturn, industry crisis, unexpected retirement and loss in employment lurking somewhere in the future?

What are you doing now, to survive the then? What new skills, capacities, knowledge, experiences, exposures and associations are you working on now, that will preserve you and in fact promote you when this current river runs dry? You know, nothing lasts forever dear, hurricane, is coming.

Many of you are attached to people and enduring a parasitic relationship. They only want to use you, take from you and obtain from you, they think only of themselves in that parasitic relationship. They love to believe you have no problems of your own or challenges of your own.  You have no struggles, painful issues or hard times. And even if you do, they assume you’re strong enough to handle all your issues and theirs all combine. You know this association is killing you and draining you but you’re attached! Too attached, your quality life is ebbing away and this relationship is making your life and friendship tasteless and worthless but you’re too attached. Dear friend, hurricane is coming; the hurricane of a shocking abandon, betrayal and ingratitude!

My dear friend, I know it’s hard to detach when you’ve become so attached. Believe me, I’ve been there, I know what I’m talking about, but hurricane is coming and you could just get swept away if you refuse to move on ahead to safety. If you don’t move, you could consequently lose everything including your wealth, health, happiness, comfort, sanity, and even your life.

The fact you want a relationship to work so desperately does not mean the other party cares as much about it dear. There’s nothing you can do if the other party is unwilling. Don’t go down in it, move on.

The fact you love a place so much does not mean your prosperity is tied to the place. If the land is producing thorns and prickles for you, if the land is barren for your business, if the land is rejecting you and your sweat investment, it’s time to relocate!

It’s hard, I know, it’s painful, I know, it’s difficult, yes, I know, but guess what, it is better. Endure the pain of cutting off and moving on today, than becoming a victim of a disaster tomorrow.

Hurricane is coming, the winds are so strong, the skies are dark with clouds; devastation is looming; emotional, psychological, financial crisis looming, your health, wealth, peace and relationships under threat, your heart is about to break, the bad news may be on its way. Don’t be caught in it, don’t live to regret, run, run now; run away now from that hurricane zone. Learn the next and new normal, the relevant things, go for new knowledge, new skills, new markets, new businesses, new friendships, new relationships, new locations and new associations. Run into your future, pay the price of temporary pain and discomfort but escape. Escape the hurricane. Make tomorrow great, build a bright and sunny summer midday by the beach side, sipping your drink and chilling in peace, feeling the soothing ocean breeze against your tender face, build a relaxed and beautiful  future my friend, detach today.